Hide and Seek

As a child it was such an adrenaline rush to hear the person counting out loud and take off running in search of the best spot to hide. Who didn't want to be the one that was never found? The one still hiding even after they gave up looking. I loved being that kid. The one who would then stroll in nonchalantly and say,"How did you not find me?" Maybe that game of hide and seek was much like my life in terms of self worth and confidence. I knew if I was found there was no way I was going to be able to out run them. I knew when they didn't find me it was so much because of their inability to see me but because they were distracted with the excitement of the game. I wasn't really hiding because I had this great spot. I was hiding because I knew I would never be able to tag someone else out and I would be stuck as "it" forever. I hid until everyone gave up so I could pretend I was better than them. So I could go in and tease them for not finding me. I was embarrassed to be me. Maybe instead of focusing on myself so much I should have been more willing to play the game. Be found and take my turn being "it" so that someone else didn't feel self-conscious. In an article titled, "Finding Self-Worth in a Selfie World" the author Henry references the game hide and seek. He says,"What if outward compassion rather than inward reflection is the barometer with which God measures our intended purpose and value?" Well craptastic. All that time spent wallowing in my own imperfections. All the time spent measuring myself next to my friends. All that wasted time. If I really wanted to serve my Heavenly Father maybe as Henry Unga suggests, as I love and serve others as my Heavenly Father expects there wouldn't be such wasted time rolling around like a hot pig in my mud puddle of self loathing. "I’ve swung too far from what I once understood about self-worth and have parlayed my divine identity into an idea of someone I’m not quite and perhaps never will be." I look at others and I don't think twice about their best being all they have to give. Why on earth would the expectation be different when I look internally? This afternoon I leave you with the lyrics from Daughter of a King. Here's to kicking those steel toed boots right in my buns and remembering yesterday's Note to Self. Love more, laugh when you want to cry and for Heaven's sakes, take off that white silk and throw on some camo! Daughter of a King Solos to Sing, Submitted Music (2007-2011) Who am I? Where did I come from? Where am I going? Who will I be? Did Heavenly Father really send His Son to die for me? Yes, He is real. I feel his spirit whisper from heaven, guiding my way, Helping me understand His love is never far away. I believe He knows my purpose; He knows my spirit; He knows my name. His love gives me the faith to learn of Christ and why He came. I will stand among the faithful, my testimony lighting the way. I’ll be a witness of and walk the path of Christ today. I gaze up towards heaven, and my soul begins to sing. Heavenly Father loves me; I’m the daughter of a king. Text: Lana Osmus Music: Lana Osmus Album: Submitted Music (2007-2011) Composition Date: 2009 More Info: CMS 2009