Looking through rose colored glasses.

There was a time not that long ago where I was convinced that many of my fellow Saints weren't looking at life, themselves and others through the clear glasses that adorn my face. They were quick to find spiritual references, exercise faith in the face of hardship and ever bold enough to tell me that perhaps there were more I could do. Rose. Colored. Glasses. I have anxiety. Debilitating anxiety. They have no idea what it's like to be me each day. To have that pit in your stomach and the knot in your chest from the minute your feet hit the ground. To be watching TV with your family and have a particular show come on. One that everyone else seems to be entertained by but that just undid any progress I had made at steeling my emotions and pretending to be "normal". No way, I do not need to gain control over my mind. I am in control. They are out of touch. Rose. Colored. Glasses. Fast forward 7 months. 7 long and painful months. 7 months of change. 7 humbling months in which the Lord used his tools and his angels to teach me and soften my heart. 7 months in which I learned that those indeed are rose colored glasses. They are the glasses of hope and love. Those rose colored glasses allow them the ability to see other's as Christ does and to serve tirelessly the ungrateful like myself. DC 88:67 And if your eye be single to my glory, your whole bodies shall be filled with light, and there shall be no darkness in you; and that body which is filled with light comprehendeth all things. I learned that I have been dismissing behaviors to my anxiety. I allowed the adversary to convince me that I wasn't capable of more. That the illness is what it is and that I was broken beyond repair. I allowed myself to give up on the light and to succumb to the darkness. It wasn't until the challenge came to gain control of my mind that I began to see the flicker of the flame within me. I realized where that light comes from. I had dulled its capabilities by allowing Satan to convince me that there was no way to overcome that dark corner of myself. That flicker was the Light of Christ within me. It has been a humbling and wonderful experience to fuel my flames and to fill myself with that light. To over power any darkness. It was in part thanks to my desire to share that light with others that Divine Energy was born. The light of Christ is the divine energy, power, or influence that proceeds from God through Christ and gives light and life to everything and might I add, everyone. Romans 12:21 Be not overcome of evil, but overcome evil with good. My power over the adversary and his influence on my mind comes from faith. Faith in the light that fills my soul. Faith that as I fuel the flames of goodness within my body that the light will grow and the darkness will dissipate and my body truly will be "filled with light" which is the light of Christ. "Faith is for the future. Faith builds on the past but never longs to stay there. Faith trusts that God has great things in store for each of us and that Christ is truly the "high priest of good things to come." As we care for the flicker of light within us we are given greater faith and control over our minds. As we exercise that faith our light grows and our opportunity to light the way for others increases. There truly will be no room for darkness.